It may be your reckoning, but for some of us, it is our awakening. Realizing that we have been bred to be complacent. To accept little morsels rather than a whole pie as progress. To follow the “status quo” and hope for the best.
To diminish ourselves, to make ourselves invisible, to silence ourselves as a method of self perseveration. To watch, read, and hear about black & brown people getting slain by police, by anyone white who “just feels unsafe” and metaphorically step over their carcasses and move past like it’s nothing in front of others while we scream in out our hearts like our ancestors before us watching lynchings and whippings, and loved ones being stolen.
To stuff the anger, sadness, and pain down deep and put a smile on our faces or provide words of solace to, or be the calm, sounding board; placating and acknowledging “it’s a shame” “but not all police” or “not all whites”.
We wonder why we haven’t been able to explain the sudden depression, immobility, inability to function, intolerance of excuses, and acceptance of “not all”.
The scream is no longer coming from our hearts.